A little wandering does you good....

Sunday June 22nd. 2014. 20:35

Determined to make something of the summer sun, (now that it is officially summer) I have been out for a good ole walk today along to the top of the harbour, by Port Solent.

There I say, and ate some lunch, and read my kindle. Basking in the sunshine, and nearly dozing off like some old codger.

It's been a daughter free weekend, ever since we agreed that she would only see me once every other week I've been at a loss to make decent use of the extra me time that's given me. Me time is always something I've struggled to do something useful with. Normally, I'd either spend it in front of the Television, laptop or asleep.

The last time it happened, it was actually unplanned. My darling daughter decided that as I had pointed out to her that the following weekend was not only my birthday weekend but also Fathers' day that it wasn't worth coming up the weekend before. (Just too much effort I guess). I think the phrase she actually used to casually dismiss me by text message on the morning she was meant to come up was 'I want to come up, but... I'm coming up next week... so don't see why I should'. Made me feel great that one.

Don't worry Chloe, I want to get you an iphone for your birthday, but I don't see why I should.

Anyhow. That weekend, I'd commented on facebook about being stood up by my daughter and one of my friends Kat then got in contact and asked if I would join her and some other friends (people we both know from where I work) as they were going down Southsea. My usual crippling 'can't say yes to going out and enjoying yourself' reared its ugly head, but I made a point of stamping my feet and overriding the inner 'no' monster.

I went out with Kat, and Mark and Katie, and we also met up with another person we all know from work, Gabi. We had a great time, playing crazy golf (when I say playing.. I mean.. losing), and well, walking up and down the beach, enjoying the sunshine.. counting how many people form work we could spot. The others also went of fair ground rides. I stood and watched the bags, and read while they looked like they were enjoying themselves. I am sure that had I taken part as well they wouldn't have enjoyed quite so much me vomiting over them or losing control of other bodily functions.

Fairground rides are a no-go area for me. Dodgem cars are about my limit. We had a nice afternoon, and rounded the day off at Katie's flat, at which we stated till late evening.

I seem a bit old to be 'hanging out' with friends and going down the funfair, but I don't care. We all had a great time.

I have quietly skipped my birthday, which was last Friday. It was really good, went to the pub with some friends from work, and ended up at mine, after stopping to Tesco for some pizza. I seem to be a lot more social than I ever used to be before. I think I might actually crack this going out and having fun lark by the time I retire, or can't walk.

Still I hear these mobility scooters are really good these days.

Anyway. This weekend, I got up late on Saturday, which meant I broke my promise to go and help Lee move out of the room he was staying in. Thankfully he wasn't depending on only me to help him. Bad person that I am. Sucky friend.

I went for a nice walk yesterday into Hilsea Lines, and onto a park at the back of Anchorage Park. There I sat for a couple of hours, taking in the rays of the sun, and... well reading and having something to eat.

In the evening I was doing some overtime, manning the lines to help inform people that have a powercut. Six hours that doesn't really feel like work, because it's so different from what I normally do.

Then today, I shamefully got up around ten thirty.. and bummed around before deciding enough was enough. After putting out a first run of washing, putting the next lot in the machine, I grabbed my bag and headed off into the sun. Coming home about seven o'clock means I'm sitting here after vacuuming the flat, and washing the kitchen and ensuite floors in my camping chair enjoying a wind-down ice cold vodka.

Hardly rock and roll, but it's still better than sitting indoors all frigging weekend watching TV or playing Second Life, or endlessly looking for something interesting to read on either Facebook, BBC News, The Independant or The Guardian. (At least you can see I get my non newsworthy non-facts from a variety of sources).

Just another manic Monday...

Monday 24th February 2014. 23:14.

Third, or is it forth, week started with the 'new' team. Not so really new anymore I guess.

I am working harder, and up and down a lot more. But I am loving it. Anything is so much easier when the people I help are a lot easier to help. Something about the eagerness, and willingness to learn.

It's just nice knowing that I can really make a difference to their day, just be being there, and by imparting knowledge and showing them how many things ARE possible, when initially they might think they aren't.

I had Chloe to stay overnight at the weekend, and she brought one of her friends, Ella for a sleepover. Having worked till 2pm on Saturday, and them arriving at 5pm, and leaving around the same time Sunday, I didn't really get that much of a weekend. Although I'm trying hard to make that not sound like I'm complaining.

I consider it a nice thing, that Chloe wants to invite friends to stay over here. The mess and chaos however isn't really from Chloe's friends though. It's normally from Chloe. Perhaps her Mother has either stronger levels of tolerance or thinly veiled insanity to be able to cope with that. Being a teenager, I guess it's pretty much Chloe's job to bring chaos, disorder and destruction to wherever she goes. At least I don't really have to deal with the moody sulking stamping of feet and slamming of doors that punctuated my teenage years.

Tomorrow is the last filming day of 'Prime Directive'. I can't quite believe it. Seems to have dragged on for so long, and just well, become part of my life that I think once it's gone I will actually miss it. Just the pain of making sure that I leave work on time in order to get a train home, eat, change, feed the cats, and to catch another train up to Steve's. I find that quite stressful in itself.

The bemoaning whilst it's in progress, and then missing once it's all over is vaguely similar to how it used to feel producing a play.

My friend Kat is leaving the place we both work at. She's got another job somewhere else. This is rather sad, as I don't really want to see her leave, but I do also understand and believe that maybe she will feel better if working in a different place. She'll get a chance to do something different. Not everyone is cut out to do the same thing, or work in the same place. It would be a terribly boring world if that were the case. She's also going on holiday in a couple of weeks time, which means she effectively leaves in two weeks.

In a week's time, I'm having a second go at meeting up with Helen for lunch, and to do some filming with my friends. Hopefully this will go ahead. Bearing in mind that last week's attempt at this failed because Helen ended up needing to stay at home doing some work, and the only people that could turn up were Andy and Paul. We abandoned the filming, and just ordered pizza.

Just for the sake of saying it, I haven't done any writing lately. Too much working, too much gazing at the telly. Words may lead to actions, but they are not actions in themselves.

July ? Already ? You have to be having a fucking laugh !

All fucking ready ?  You must be bloody joking ! How the hell has half the year passed without so much as a blink. It's ridiculous. I want a refund. I want to speak to a manager. 

Monday July 1st. Not really a bad day. It was very warm last night, and it's only moderately cooler tonight. I couldn't get that much sleep last night. As it was I decided to make things easy for myself, and allow for a lie in, but having a bath Sunday night. 

The bath, I'm not going to lie was absolutely lovely. It's been quite a while since I pampered myself with a nice soak. Anyway. To bed I went. Fresh and clean. Ready to slumber I may have been, but my body and mind we not really on the same page as it were. I was just wide awake. So there I lay, trying to get to sleep. Feeling hot, with windows open as much as I dare, worrying slightly that the cats might try and get out the windows overnight. 

None the less, I've had a really good day today at work. I'd rather have gotten more creative stuff done, but I foolishly turned on that machine which sucks away my evenings. It is only now, as I type that I realise one of the reasons I had not gone to bed sooner was so that I could stay up and watch the first episode of the last series of Skins - the exceedingly well written, casted, directed and acted youth drama that's been running for about the last five years. Every couple of years they change out the characters, and present a different set of backgrounds and problems. 

I had made myself stay up in order to watch that. But have forgotten when it got to Ten O'Clock and started watching some other stuff (Have I Got News for You) on Dave. I've probably seen the episode fourteen times already. 

Dammit. I will just have to check up on the catchup application tomorrow. I am not now going to watch it tonight. 

Okay. July 1st. I actually did some work editing my NaNoWriMo over the weekend. I didn't make a huge amount of progress, but still, I was satisfied that I actually started looking at the damn thing again. 

I have brought a pair of flip-flops. 

Every self defacing middle aged man should buy himself a pair of flip-flops. Just so everyone else can laugh at him when he trips over and stubs his toe. 

Seriously, it was bloody boiling over the weekend, and having gotten on a train to go pick up my daughter, only to have her call me to tell me she was getting a light to mine, I suddenly found myself with the opportunity to get off the train at Hilsea, walk back towards the flat - going past Lidl. I don't normally get to go in there, so had a peak, and ended up buying a couple of things for Chloe's birthday. 

I also brought the flip-flops. To be honest, at one pound forty-nine I couldn't give a shit if they fall apart next week. (Remember this, because if they do, I will be moaning like hell. What a waste of money, I'll say). 

Anyway, with only weeks to go, Chloe has finally acted upon my request to provide me with that which is most arduous and difficult. The challenge to end all others. The list to separate the idiots from the stupid. I speak of course, of the birthday list. That sacred thing which the parent of any Teenager knows they dare not purchase gifts without consulting THE LIST. 

 

Have we all stopped sending burthrday cards ?

A thought occurred to me today, as I placed a comment on someone's facebook wall wishing them a happy birthday. Does anyone send birthday cards anymore ?

No wonder the Post office is screwed. Not only is everyone busy emailing each other instead of committing their important (and unimportant) messages on a piece of dead tree, but they aren't feeling obliged to send birthday cards to people they barely know or like.

Perhaps this isn't the case, as I haven't seen a rash of redundancies at Birthdays or Celebrations. There are, however more and more operators jumping on the Moonpig model for personalised cards.

The point I wanted to think about was, well, apart from showing what a tight git I am, do people think any less of me for adding some carefully considered words to their facebook page instead of spending over a pound, on a card I'll probably forget to give to them anyway.

Have any of them noticed that I habitually say pretty much the same thing to each person ? IE 'Happy Birthday mate. Hope you have / had a great day !!' (The double exclamation mark is really, really important). Of course there is the other comment 'Happy Birthday. Don't do anything I wouldn't'. Which may not leave them with much of a list of things to avoid, none the less. Hardly original is it ?

Looking by the number of comments from other people, I can only assume that perhaps not all of them would have bothered to buy a birthday card before the advent of social networking. (Internet stalking).

Does this signal a greater level of emotional attachment and well wishing, made easier by the technology, or does it demonstrate the absence of real feeling in a clinical world ?

Do we devalue the sentiment by not having to pay to send it ?

All I'm bothered about is that facebook handily reminds me that it's someone's birthday so that I can write my 'standard birthday comment'.